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* Humour: Internet Business Sucks or does it
Posted Apr 02, 2004 - 01:31 AM
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Inspiration and Advice

Five Minutes
A Satire o­n the time management skills of an internet professional
By Dan Reinhold


You’re hunched at the computer, flicking the keys with the greatest of ease – or, like me, poking each stroke with the speed of a…umm…well, it DID rhyme!


You’re mesmerized for hours by the wonders of Internet business – you market, you negotiate, you design, you submit, you research, you chat…a lot…


Enthralled and empowered by your cyber-independence, you plan and scheme, plot and dream.

While life in the REAL world goes o­n around you…

“Hey Mom, can I have lunch now?? It’s three o’clock!!”

“Huh? Whaa…yeah, five minutes, honey…lessee, click here…”

Funny how the daily grind hasn’t ground to a halt…

“Dad?? Couldya sign this? It just says that you know about my tryin’ to burn down the school and ya assume full financial responsibility…No big deal, couple alarms…”

“Darn HTML code…Hmm? Yeah…five minutes, umm…son??”

Things just keep rolling o­n…

“Ya GOTTA see this cool fort me and Billy Scuzbucket built, Grandma!!! And we got grenades, napalm, coupla ICBMs…WAAAY cool!!!”

“Whazzat? D’ja want something, sweetie? I’ll be right there…just five minutes…”

Life is like that…

“Are you Dilbert Greenbaumgarten? Sir, are you aware that your children are conducting a warehouse sale of stolen merchandise in your garage? You’ll have to come with us, sir.”

“Yeah, yeah…garage sale, ahh…be with ya in five minutes…just leave the money in the coffee can o­n the folding table, K??”


Just five minutes…

Whoa…super-important e-mail…ahh, look, be with ya in five minutes…seen the kids?? Honey?
Hello?? Coulda sworn we had furniture before…

With two boys, a dog, a cat, a wife and a household to keep together to boot, Dan Reinhold is the editor of WAHumor to hang o­n to his sanity by showing how insane the work-at-home community can be. Work at home? You deserve a laugh!

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